inzayned:

when you can’t hear what someone says and they repeat it 98 times and you’re still like

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straightedgemama:

thew0lfqueen:

Don’t date someone you wouldn’t own a dog with

This is like really sound advice though

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deersatan:

"dinner’s ready!"

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sclez:

sweetbuttandhellabooty:

can we just take a moment and think about the time my dad accidentally made a fried egg that looked exactly like africa

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i’m the most impressed by the fact the egg also has madagascar

madeggascar

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johnkatier:

dude god could come down from heaven with a million angels and tell me that gif is pronounced “jif” and i still wouldn’t fucking do it

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goodbyemisery:

i went into a whole foods and got to hear a woman arguing with a guy at the meat counter because she wanted grass fed organic chicken and he was desperately trying to explain to her that chickens don’t eat grass

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deal-breaker:

Welcome to America where everyone is equal except everyone

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officialdaddyegbert:

davvvd:

-annoying:

the “i’m not afraid to verbally assault a middle schooler if they look at my kid the wrong way” haircut

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I thought this was the “I would like to speak with a manager” haircut

it’s both.

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